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123
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請教英文達人...關於英文演講

恩..這星期五要英文演講啦  時間要1分半鐘到2分
我想請問一下關於英文演講一些需要注意的情形


這裡應該有很多身居外國的朋友吧 可否幫小弟看一下這篇稿子

Hello!Everyone, today I want to talk about a student who failed a grade

One year is a period of very long time

We can do a lot of things at this period of time

Like to take a trip,to learn more new things

But to a student who failed a grade

That stand for he will lost one year to do these things

and stand for he have not managed time properly

“Time is money”

To manage time properly is very important

Time passes very fast

We should fully utilize time

Do some meaningful things

I think the student shoud be very regretful

But…..so what?

The wheel of time is forever in motion

I hope everyone can manage time properly

And all pass

Thank you for your listening

Have a nice day!

小弟的英文破破的 我是用中文寫然後翻 我還用DR。EYE。。。
不知有何須改進之處?

還有倒數第2句
是Thank you for your listening
還是Thank you for listening

最後感謝各位大大撥空觀看 謝啦
     
      
舊 2006-01-01, 10:18 PM #1
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123離線中  
alanyu
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no 翻譯軟體..... it's all chinglish....
有些句子說法怪怪的....
把句子連起來maybe better
 
舊 2006-01-02, 11:57 AM #2
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alanyu離線中  
duck
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這個比較像在講話, 而且你沒辦法很連慣的講下去...
而且不對題, 被當掉跟不會管理時間不要連節太多...
最好是可以提一點為什麼被當掉, 要怎麼改善...
在來就是要連慣起來, 你這雖然是演講, 不過比較像老師上課對學生講話... 講一句停一下的感覺...
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When the Nazis came for the communists, I remained silent; I was not a communist.
When they locked up the social democrats, I remained silent; I was not a social democrat.
When they came for the trade unionists, I did not speak out; I was not a trade unionist.
When they came for the Jews, I remained silent; I was not a Jew.
When they came for me, there was no one left to speak out.

Martin Niemöller (1892-1984)
舊 2006-01-02, 12:12 PM #3
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pc
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文章: 6,045
我真的是有看沒有懂,還是讓我們看看你的中文原稿吧,
希望我們最少還能看得懂你的中文原稿...........
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舊 2006-01-02, 12:31 PM #4
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pc離線中  
s1300045
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  我對內容也很有意見,這篇演講的內容模糊不清。到底主題是在討論善用時間?還是學分不及格的影響?是否能將演講的題目公佈一下呢?
舊 2006-01-02, 12:38 PM #5
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s1300045離線中  
Coolsquirtle
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加入日期: Dec 2002
您的住址: 多倫多
文章: 36
試試看這個吧

Hi, today my topic is about a student who failed and had to retake a grade.
A year is a very long period of time which allows us to participate in many activities such field trips and the chance to learn new ideas and information. However, for a student that failed a grade, he will not be able to experience these things because he will lose it to redoing something he failed to accomplish on the first try. He did not understand the importance of time, so he did not manage his time properly. Often people would said “Time is money”, so having the ability to manage time is very important since time passes through us very fast. People should fully utilize time to do meaningful things, like studying and homework when they are assigned to you. I think this student regretted his inability to make proper use of this time. But it is too late for him to change anything, time will never stop and wait for him and life goes on. On this note, I hope everyone can manage their time properly and achieve the goals you wish for. Thank you for your listening and have a nice day!
__________________
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
蒲公英的形狀 在飄散 它絕望 的飛翔 她只唱 只想 這首 止戰之殤
----------------------------------------------
舊 2006-01-02, 02:01 PM #6
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Coolsquirtle離線中  
123
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剛放學回家........

真是SORRY.... 這次的演講主題是我們老師從課文中挑了個句子 叫我們演講有關於這個句子的內容
本身主題就很模糊了 我也不知該如何是好
句子如下

To realize the value of one year,ask a student who fail grade.

本課的內容主要就是在說明善用時間 於是我就寫這樣嚕 把比較多的部分放在時間上
很抱歉沒有講清楚

謝謝各位大大的指導 這對我的英文有很大的幫助
畢竟我英文程度不太好 加上受到台灣英文教育的教導下 選擇題是對我OK啦 但是遇到這種就不太行了
寫個文章常常丟3 落4 ....

此文章於 2006-01-02 06:01 PM 被 123 編輯.
舊 2006-01-02, 05:57 PM #7
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123離線中  
Coolsquirtle
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加入日期: Dec 2002
您的住址: 多倫多
文章: 36
引用:
作者123
剛放學回家........

真是SORRY.... 這次的演講主題是我們老師從課文中挑了個句子 叫我們演講有關於這個句子的內容
本身主題就很模糊了 我也不知該如何是好
句子如下

To realize the value of one year,ask a student who fail grade.

本課的內容主要就是在說明善用時間 於是我就寫這樣嚕 把比較多的部分放在時間上
很抱歉沒有講清楚

謝謝各位大大的指導 這對我的英文有很大的幫助
畢竟我英文程度不太好 加上受到台灣英文教育的教導下 選擇題是對我OK啦 但是遇到這種就不太行了
寫個文章常常丟3 落4 ....


妳寫的我幫你改過了,在上面,你看看自己懂不懂,有問題再問
__________________
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
蒲公英的形狀 在飄散 它絕望 的飛翔 她只唱 只想 這首 止戰之殤
----------------------------------------------
舊 2006-01-02, 06:07 PM #8
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Coolsquirtle離線中  
123
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Smile

引用:
作者Coolsquirtle
妳寫的我幫你改過了,在上面,你看看自己懂不懂,有問題再問

恩 真是謝了 稍微看了一下...果然是高手...句子上很連貫..好多生字要查..我背的不夠多

不過如果就拿這個去演講 我看演講完老師大該就會問我是哪裡抄來的

努力鑽研中
舊 2006-01-02, 06:36 PM #9
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123離線中  


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